The Them Test

Hey, welcome to the Human Club!  We have cake, an open bar, and some wonderful entertainment

Sound check.

warming up on the main stage.  Oh, but there’s one thing we need to check before you can come inside and participate.  You need to take the Them Test.

The Them Test?  You’ve never heard of it?

Don’t you worry your pretty little head.  Your application states that you’re not racist or a bigot so there’s nothing to be concerned over.  It's like the Turing Test but in reverse and easier.  The test only has two parts, and it’s graded pass/fail.  Here’s how the Them Test goes:

1 – Do you define any social, racial, economic, ethnic, age, gender, religious, or sexual orientation group as “them”?

2 – Based on defining “them”, do you deny “them” any of the rights or privileges which current laws provide you?

See, piece of cake.  Pass/Fail.  No worries.

Wait, what do you mean you don’t get it?  Ok, ok, here’s some explanation.

Question #1 isn’t that big of a deal.  Defining groups of people by various status is just coding.  It makes it easier for we members of the Human Club to recognize the vast diversity that exists on our planet.  There is some wondrous variety among human beings and always has been.  It’s only when we associate negative connotations and stereotypes with individuals who align with “them” that this becomes an issue.

Of all the souls I've encountered in my travels
theirs was the most—human.

You love diversity, as your application states, so no big deal so far.

Question #2 on the other hand, is a big deal.  If you said “Yes” then I’m afraid we can’t let you into the Human Club.  Instead of celebrating our differences, you’re using that defined status to discriminate against “them”.  You’re also committing the logical fallacy of division by associating all negative connotations and stereotypes onto an individual who can be identified as part of “them”.

Yes, I’m afraid it is discrimination.

No, it doesn’t matter that your religion preaches it.

Religion is meant for an individual to achieve communication and communion with his/her god of choice.  To help find a path through the chaos that is life.  Imposing that choice on others is an unfortunate outgrowth of religion that has resulted in the justification of theft, rape, murder, slavery, oppression and even genocide.  If your religion preaches against a “them”, you should think and rethink how that helps you achieve your goal of becoming closer to your god.
 
Are you ready to take the test?